My belief in Believing (By Caiphas)

Belief in anything has been a constant battle for me. Since I started to ignore the idea of god, I’ve been looking for something to keep me sane in this life. It isn’t as ease as some would believe. But after much work, I have figured out what I believe in.

I follow the existentialist belief that there is no god and the only way that a human can find meaning in life is to make something of it for himself. But, I don’t believe that there is absolutely no order to the events of the world. Yes, there is no accurate way to predict the distant future, but why would we want that? Discovering the world of tomorrow is so much more exciting that being informed about it. There must be a pattern in the chaos that is life, however remote, that we follow. Maybe it is in the past, I don’t know. But what I do know is that the present cannot exist by itself. Only when a past has been sorted out to define a future for itself can the present truly exist.

The idea of heaven is insulting to me now. After much thought, I see that heaven is the equivalent of a cheat in a computer game. You may spend months, even years trying to get through on your own skill. Then, when you get the cheat, everything becomes so easy that all enjoyment is lost. Heaven is that cheat. You spend all you life striving and then, when you die, everything is given to you on a silver platter and it’s worth is lost. I believe that heaven isn’t a place, but a moment that every one should experience before they die. When people say that their life flashed before their eyes, that is my version of heaven. All you deeds, good and bad, Presented in an instant that will determine if your life was worth it. That is my view of heaven.

And even after that, where do we go. I believe that the soul is what makes animal life different to rocks or liquids. After all, that’s all life really is. A freak occurrence where oil mixed with rock to create life. I believe that the soul is part of the ether that makes animals “Alive”. When we die, our ether returns to the chaos that it came from and, when it is time, returns to create life in any way shape or form.

Many have tried to answer that ultimate question, I believe that I have answered it. Only you can really decide for yourself if what I say makes sense.

A long long time ago, originality was original. (By Caiphas)

It has been brought to my attention recently that people are unimaginative.

Truly, there is need of a story that has an original idea in it, not just a re-doo of a world that has been exploited many times before. Books such as the “Alex Rider Series” are good because they are original. Every other story that has followed this idea (“Mini-Bond”), even the movie of “Stormbreaker”, has been a disappointment that warrants some attention from the intelligent.

Take Eragon, for example. On closer inspection, it turns out to be nothing more than “Star-Wars” in a sheep skin cloth, with a sword of steel, a horse of flesh and a force of magic that can actually be seen. In the words of a friend of a friend of mine: Farm boy gets magical powers, adoptive uncle is killed by evil empire on the orders of the evil emperor (Who was once a rider but turned dark and overthrew the country to seize power for himself, then destroyed the riders/jedi), boy flees with old hermit (who was once a member of a magical peace-keeping organisation, who ride dragons), meets gun/bow-and-arrow toting, solitary guy, rescues princess from the heart of the Evil Empire’s base, old hermit teacher is killed by empire, boy goes to find a hidden, rebel alliance, meanwhile the ‘ultimate destructive force’ is coming towards them to destroy the rebel base, boy defeats army, leaves to learn magic from a mysterious forest-dwelling crippled elf, discovers that his former companion has turned against him and that evil apprentice/second in command to emperor was his father. Coincidence, I think not.

When you look at it from my perspective, All things in this world are very unoriginal. The head of American Intelligence being called the “Pentagon”, The current “Bond” film being called “Quantum of Solace”, People dying for true love, it’s all just been put into a different uniform, then told in a slightly different way. I believe that Originality is dead. All I need is your approval.

James Bond in the Quantum of Solace. I know what that means (By Caiphas)

Let me start by saying what a ride this film is for anyone that sees it. The film gives the viewer one second before it kicks into overdrive and doesn’t stop until the credits roll at the end. Some of the action in the film has to be seen to be believed, some parts cannot be believed when seen and some scenes have to be believed to be seen in a believable way. Essentially, the film suspends your disbelief as far as it can be stretched and, as a result, does drop it at some points. But at the rate this movie moves, you can’t discuss it until the end.

Daniel Craig was an excellent choice for bond and does the series credit with his performance. Unfortunately, the majority of that performance is taken up with the action. There is very little of the sweet talking, smooth operating and always dashing Bonds of old. The girls are kept to a minimum and the gadgets are nonexistent. I didn’t see any and my cohort, who can spot a McDonalds chip bag in a frame of film, couldn’t find anything that they didn’t have themselves. And even with all the action that goes on in the film, can we be reminded that the star is Bond, James Bond? Not too much to ask for.

The title throws most people. “Quantum of Solace”, according to an interview with Daniel, is a moment that all humans have in which they decide which choice is the right one. But in its actual Latin translation, it roughly comes out as “A part of solitude”. Since the film doesn’t mention either of these facts, the title is completely useless to anyone trying to guess what the film is about from the title. The only useful thing about it is that people look at it and think “Oh… that sounds deep and complex. Must be a good film” this works to a degree.

The story is both complex and intrinsically linked with the precluding film “Casino Royale”. Unlike the other Bond films, where the only thing you had to know was that he was a spy called Bond, James Bond, this film is a direct sequel to Casino and therefore requires viewers to have a comprehensive knowledge of the predecessor to have any hope of holding onto the mad bull that is Quantum. Only one of my friends hadn’t seen the previous film and got through by forgetting the parts of the film that were connected to Casino. So he missed half of the story, he still got his fix of action.

Score:

4/5: A rip roaring ride that could have had a bit more sentimentality and a less complex plot, but otherwise comes out as a Saturday night well spent.

Shoes, the reality of the fad (By Caiphas)

To me, shoes are, without a doubt, absolutely unimportant. They hold no sway over me at all and cannot influence me in any way. But I have started to realise that shoes are infecting the minds of people around the world. They are eating away at people’s wallets and their personality. People spend money on a pair of shoes that look like a 2 year old had taken to them with a crayon, a pair of scissors, and a will to make the biggest mess possible that is still wearable; when they could, and logically should, be spending it on important things, like keeping the garden watered or making sure their children can go to university.

 

First and foremost: Shoes won’t get you everywhere in life. In fact, people seem amazed by the amount of places that shoes can’t take them. Take school for example. Up until a few weeks ago, students were all wearing school shoes and this didn’t seem to make any difference to their grades. Now that we are in free dress, people have taken it upon them selves to find the rarest, non-endangered animal and skin it to wear on their feet. And their grades do not change. At the work place, loafers don’t make for good working. In dancing, Ug boots aren’t the go. And in politics, sandals cannot be worn. So why is it so important that we make an impression else where if our feet are on the ground most of the time? You should be spending that money on a nice hat, or a good hair cut, not stupid shoes.

 

Secondly, there is no importance to shoe type. I myself only have two pairs of shoes: My school shoes (Which can double as performance shoes) and my runners. I have no need for volleys, airs, gumboots, Ug boots, loafers, sneakers, clogs, slippers, sandals, platforms, cleats, bowling shoes, climbing shoes, cycling shoes, jazz shoes, thongs or any other variation therefore unmentioned. My opinion of this is there is no point for so many types. Shoe manufactures should just get over their rivalries, remove all types of shoe from the shelves and make one type of shoe that suited every occasion. Then the world would be able to overcome the financial crisis.

 

Thirdly, there is no real importance that can be connected to shoes. If anyone came up to me and tries to show off a pair of vomit coloured soles with mink as the tongue and diamonds for laces, I would first cover the shoes in vomit, save the mink that they have heartlessly skinned and slit their throat with the laces. At least, that’s what I feel like doing. I never get past the vomit stage. In short, I don’t care what your shoe is made out of or who wore it before you. The only interest this would have to me would be what disease you have picked up from wearing someone else’s shoes

 

Fourthly: a person cannot be judge by the quality (Which doesn’t exist) of their footwear. The only way you can show shoes of is if A): You shove them in someone’s face, which considering they have been on you feet is not an attractive prospect. B): watching a cat walk, which, may I say, usually involves the models wearing clothing, not just shoes. Plus the idea of fashion is to keep the eye up, no staring at the ground. Or C): you have taken them off to show them off. As before, this would be extremely unattractive and try hard in the extreme. I have never had more than two pairs of shoes all my life and has it done me injury? Never!

 

The shoe, therefore, must be like the cigarette. It has no beneficial qualities, aside from making you apparently look cooler, it hits your wallet without remorse and, despite all of the different types, they all pretty much do the same job. So why is there so much controversy over shoe types? I just don’t know. Maybe someone out there can explain it to me. But I doubt it.

“Brisingr.” Politics, Gore and Politics (By Caiphas)

As well as doing movie reviews, I have started to do book reviews. Obviously they will get better as I learn more.

After three weeks of reading, I have finally finished Brisingr. For those not in the know, Brisingr is the third instalment in the Inheritance Trilogy (Now the Inheritance Cycle) which is essentially the “Twilight series” for guys, not story wise, but success wise. Unfortunately, for the unwise, this book tries to be too wise most of the time and looses the true flair it had when “Eragon” first hit the shelves.

The story begins with a synopsis of the previous two books, which should be the make or break point for any reader that has no patience. The synopsis actually makes it possible to start with “Brisingr” without reading the other books, but then you loose the true power of the story, which is what makes the third book interesting.

When I say interesting, I don’t mean interesting to people who aren’t into that sort of stuff. The series relies on a LOTR style backdrop, with magic, dragons, a lost race of super heroes, a mad evil king, elves, dwarves, mountains, swords and politics. Yes, there is a hell of a lot of politics in this book. These encounters with the structure of all the races leaves very little time for exploring the world or for any real action.

All the action in the book is gory. That is the book’s greatest flaw. Its action relies on the readers ability to visualise decapitation, evisceration, mutilation and all three at the same time. But even this action is sparse. With in 750 pages, not a lot of action is put down. Most of the time is spent on the politics. In fact, the book follows a pattern. The pattern goes:

politicspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoli

ticspoliticsGOREpoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticspoliticsGORE

politicspoliticspoliticspoliticsTRUTHGOREDEATHEND.

But for those that have read the other books, the last few chapters really have a profound effect on the reader. Pity there are so many chapters.

Rating: 3.5/5. long but rewarding. plus Chris has a way with his stories that you never really can stop reading, no matter how soporific.

Despite all I have said about how bad the book is, I still enjoyed it. Just not as much as I had hoped I would.

A call for Ginger Justice (By Caiphas)

It has been in my mind for a long time that the “Red Head” is a target. I myself have this affliction and I bear it with pride. But over the years, I have noticed a few flaws in the reasoning of the Insult of “Ranger” I will list five of them now.

1.     What is the origin of the insult? Most people believe that is the Orang-utan, which is orange that spawned the insult. If that is the case, why aren’t small people called “Spiders” after the spider monkey? Why aren’t people with black hair called “Gorillas”? Why fat people aren’t called “King Kong”? There is no sense to the whole fad, since humans evolved from apes. So, in a twisted way, “Ranger” is a compliment.

2.     Using the name in a seemingly good way only makes it worse. I heard a while back that Melbourne zoo was planning to have a “Ranger day” to raise funds for the orang-utans. Apparently red heads would get in for free. That isn’t the way to go about this problem and the apes wouldn’t appreciate it either.

3.     Chris Lilly is anathema to red heads now. When Sumer Heights High first hit TV, there was a case concerning a character that beared a likeness and a similar story to a person in real life. This made the news around Australia and the show was made infamous for this. What the media failed to highlight was the fact that the character Jonah made red heads everywhere a target more than they already were. Good job Chris on the show, but shame on you Jonah.

4.     If you’re going to insult a Red Head, at least do it properly. A few weeks ago I was walking down a street and some nut in a car drove past and yelled out “Get off the street Goliwog” I mean, it was bad enough that the guy yelled at me for no reason, but to confuse a red head with a Jamaican is racist and idiotic.

5. At least there is more sense in the insults these days. In the “Good Old Days” a red head was referred to as “Bluey”. There is even less sense in this word than there is with “Ranger”. At least let the non-colour blind people make the insults.

In any case, I believe that this has gone too far. I have put a poll down for your approval. The time for procrastination is over. One day I know that the Ginger heads will walk the streets without being confused with an ape or an insulting doll. It’s just common sense.

Borrowing, the 8th deadly sin, and probably your last one (By Caiphas)

Why do libraries still exist? I have often wondered this whenever I am told to “Borrow” a book. Maybe it’s just me, but I prefer to own all the books I read. I am uncomfortable with not knowing where a book has been before it has come to me. Also, the library never stocks the books I want. All they have are the oldest books in which half of the facts are wrong or religiously connected. And whenever you borrow a book, you feel pressured into reading it with the return by date always looming on the horizon.

I think the main reason I hate libraries is because I hate using things that aren’t mine. There is always a catch. For example, when I was looking for a personal loan to go to University, all of the “Safe” banks had completely unreasonable interest rates and the only banks that had low interest rates were the dodgy, low grade, small portfolio banks that are probably run by a student that left school in year 10 to become an “Entrepreneur” and create a company that could be shut down when their savings are at a level they can retire at.

In fact, I think all borrowing is stupid. I believe that if you can’t afford it, don’t buy it. Borrowing is the reason that the market is bleeding to death right now. Borrowing relies too much on the other party respecting your own right to what you have lent them. If I lent someone a book and it came back in bad condition, then that is my own problem deal with. I can’t expect them to respect my property.

Because of this, I never lend anything to anyone. I am very stingy with borrowing because of the history I have with is. I will give this bit of advice to anyone that cares to listen to it. Never borrow. It only ends in hot water.

Return of the Mummy…again. (By Caiphas)

Let me say this right of the top, Mummy 3 is a flop. It has tried to re-create the hype felt over the first two (Brilliant) movies but right from the start you can tell it is dead on its feet. I was warned not to go see it, that it was a waste of money and time. It is a waste of time, but not entirely a waste of money.

All of the actors are obviously past their prime (With the exception of Luke Ford (Jonathan) who was always a presence in the other films. He lives up to his normal, self preserving self and does it with the same old energy that made him so like able to me.

Brendan Fraiser is past his prime. And the fact that they couldn’t get Rachael Weitz (Sorry if that is spelt incorrectly) to play the feminine lead means to me that she obviously was the smart one in the group. The son is woefully predictable in his emotional ties, as is everyone else (Save Jonathan). Yet, even though a lot of the film is focused on the romances that occur, it doesn’t explore them in any detail other than “I love you, but we can’t be together.” Even thought i am not a fan of Soppy films, it needed to be a little more soppy.

Jet Li. Not enough of him. good that he only spoke Chinese (Which by the way is highly inaccurate) but not enough of him. And as for every second character changing language every third word, it is confusing and pointless. What else is pointless is that every time something happens, the Movie has to explain what is happening. It is so demeaning that it even makes you dumb while you watch it, so much so that Ozzyfrog actually asked me why so and so wanted so and so dead.

The CGI was also a let down. From the past films, and indeed from the fact that we are in the 21st century, one would expect that the CGI would be believable. This is not the case in the Mummy 3. I would say that the CGI from the first two films is superior to this film in every way possible.

While the film does have some saving moments, Jonathan proposing to a yak and the Yeti helping the good guys, the sheer failure to live up to the predecessors makes it a “Must not see”

Rating:          1.5/5. Drawn out yet not long enough and no where near as exciting as i hoped it to be.

Other possible titles: The Mummy returns…again. But this time, because we can’t get Chris Vosloo to play the mummy, we hired someone who probably didn’t know what he was getting into when he sighed on

Concern for CERN is pointless for particles (By Caiphas)

Who ever said the world would end today is an ignorant fool. He is looking for attention because someone who didn’t know him was an easy target to aim his emo, death obsessed nature at. He believes that it is a good thing the world will end and that it is going to end without a shadow of a doubt.

Wrong, Wrong and Wrong again. Three reasons why it is perfectly safe for CERN to fire the particle accelerator.

1.          Probability. When America detonated the first nuclear bomb over Hiroshima, there was a 65% chance that the reaction would continue and destroy the universe. They did it anyway and they didn’t tell the general public about the full extent of the issue. The chance that the world will end because the accelerator will create a black hole and destroy the world is 2%. And they have told us this fact. You have more chance of having the roof fall on your head than being sucked into a black hole. they just don’t have the power to create a blackhole of any size.

2.          Backing. This project has been going on for over 25 years. It was shut down at one point and was re-instigated a short time ago. Trillions and Trillions of dollars have gone into this project to ensure its safety and its success. Every governmnet on the planet is backing it in one way or another and the safety precautions are so high that they could deactivate it a microsecond after they have started it. do you really believe that the world has been funding its own demise? Global warming is more damaging that this. We should be panicking about that.

3.          Control. The project is happening in Switzerland. In every war they have never taken a side, they have remained neutral all the way through. CERN has already created Anti-matter and the world hasn’t died. The swiss hold a majority of the worlds money and they give it out when people need it. They are famous for cheese. Cheese, and people think that they will destroy the world. Unbelievable.

So to all those who have made a wish list of all the things that they wanted to do in their life, get the facts straight. The world will not die and that is that.

The Universe according to a 10 year old (By Caiphas)

I was going through some old files and I found this article I wrote when I was ten. I think it is Pretty good. You be the Judge.

Eternal.
That was what the Universe was. An unending cycle of creation and destruction. Of wonder and terror. A force of nature that was nature itself. Nature as seen by any sentient being that could see. It was all that could be seen, heard, tasted, touched and smelt. It ruled the senses, dominated the mind and left all that studied it swirling in the whirlpool of its infinite discoveries. It defied any definition that did it any real justice and yet the ultimate number of people claimed to know the Universe.

 There were people who claimed to know what a star really looked like without even having it within a thousand kilometres of their eyes. There were others who thought that the universe revolved around them and would kill any who defied them. There were those who lived within the stars that thought that, in their immense wealth of knowledge that they held the answer to every question ever asked. There were those who accepted that they were too shallow to understand the universe in any aspect and those who were too deep in their own worries to care.

 All of these beings, regardless of species, had one crucial connection with each other. Even though some never met each other, some hated others, some were ignorant of the others existence or were to primitive or advanced to truly connect, they all shared a bond that bound them together so tightly that only the Universe they resided in could remove it.

 All of them had gazed of into the stars and wondered. Wondered if there was any one else out there, if there was any other place that cold be called home. Wondered why the start twinkled, why they shone, why they died and why they did it so spectacularly. Why there was only colour where light shone, why life only existed where it did and why they were there to contemplate all of this.
 Some strove to answer these questions. They set up instituted with names that tried to outdo the last institute so as to get the greatest minds together to answer these questions. Some were in vain, but some uncovered things that changed the way their world thought ever after on the Universe.

 Some ignored these urges. They kept themselves busy with trivial matters that only existed in their lives to distract them from thinking. These people lived happily until, when they knew they would die, they would gaze back upon the sky that had ruled their imagination, their aspirations, their dreams and think to themselves if the sky was the limit. The answer was always a disappointed no.

  A few went to the extreme of trying to rule all that could be ruled. They made weapons and forged armies to fight the armies forged by others of the same mindset. They tried to extend their lives, no matter how long they were naturally, to the point that they had forgotten why they had started on this course. They would then look to the heavens, close their eyes, and become part of them.

 But all of these people combined knew nothing. They knew nothing of the biggest picture that was the Wikiverse. Despite of all it offered, it refused to be explained by any. The greatest question of all was the question that only one being knew the answer to. This being was the Universe and in the four hundred billion years it had shone, it never told any one.

 But time tells all that are patient enough to listen.